Blogger Tag = Monkeys on Keyboards

Courtesy of a tag from the dynamic duo, twosuperheroes, I have been de-evolutionized into primitive user.

Me Quickening. Hear me grunt. See me ping blog. Me get blog tag.

“We've heard that a million monkeys at a keyboard could produce the Complete Works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.” -Robert Wilensky-


Hahaha. It did get me do more surfing. I was looking for 4 serious, new bloggers who potentially have not yet been tagged by this menace. And thus, I sneeze on your blogs.

Fly Over Me: Because I've yet to catch you in person!
Raising Mercury's Negative Negative Positive: Because I keep catching you in this blog!
Adino Online: Because your dear wife needs more publicity!
Satkuru.com: Because I like your pubilcity!

These infected bloggers are under no obligation whatsoever to infect other bloggers. This is just to say I like your pages and that your names are not in the Unsaved-Monkeys-List (scroll down see below). Now spread the blog tag and help prove Robert Wilensky... partially wrong.

The Strategist Notebook, Link Addiction, Ardour of the Heart, When Life Becomes a Book, The Malaysian Life, Yogatta.com What goes under the sun, Roshidan’s Cyber Station, Sasha says, Arts of Physics, And the legend lives, My View, My Life, A Simple Life, What Women REALLY Think, Not Much More Than This, Jayedee, Jenn, Beth, Christie Marla, Cailin, Simone, FlipFlopMom, Katrina, Gill’s Jottings, Work of the Poet Wakela Modern Day Goddess Livin With Me, Writing in Faith, Maiylah’s Snippets GreenBucks, Its Not a Weekend; Its a Lifestyle, Rooms of My Heart, Life with the Two Crazy Dogs, Joy of a Homemaker, Shifting Sand, A Tale of Two Superheroes,Shadow Pimpernel

Violent Traditions: Crimes of Honour

There are 3 crimes in this world, either from history or in this day and age, that I hold a steadfast opinion about; terrorism, torture and rape.

That opinion, to put it bluntly, it sickens me.

I was reading the Star newspaper, World section - FYI, I always read the World section first – that I can’t help but take to root in my mind about the article from Guardian Newspapers Limited.

The article concerns the practices of forced marriages, marital rape, honour killings and some of other names but still in the same context. In short, when a person dishonours the family name and standing, say, a girl who wants to be a business woman instead of a businessman’s housewife, her rebellion, should she choose to proceed with it, gives her family license to kill her.

Crimes like these are widespread and often hushed up because ‘...it’s a family matter’.

F**k that.

And I don’t care if your sons, brothers and third-cousin come after me for saying that too.

Anything and everything family matters cover the fruits of the past, the close bonds and the future of the clan. They DO NOT have jurisdiction over a person’s life. Life is God’s gift and death is God’s will. Killing a girl because she rebelled and choose her own path is not ‘honourable’. It’s not even under ‘necessary’.

That’s f**king murder no matter how pretty the family covers it.

Why did they do it? Because going against the family’s wishes, making her own decisions against her elders’ life-long planning scheme shames the family name and standing in the close-knit community and - more dangerously - instil bad ideas into the younger generation and weaken the community as a structure.

No matter how good the maverick’s intentions, if it’s against the out-dated rules of the clan, his or her next step towards individuality would be paid with death. By death, it doesn’t really matter if the maverick truly deserves it or not. Death by dishonour is mostly so that the warning in drummed into others.

Rebel. Get killed.

Why do these families do it? Why do they kill for name and standing? Do they even check properly about the girl’s decision?

Crimes of honour is neither a new thing or a religious thing. It’s a cultural thing. Ever noticed that a really big attribute of honour killings were done by Asian families?

It’s a practise that dates back for so long; I rather not bother you with the background and reasoning on what started this stupidity. But here’s something all cultures agree upon.

Women are beautiful creatures. They should have fine skin and be adorned with jewels and silk. The prettiest women get the most charming man with lots of money and social standing. Basically, a prince charming.

The so-called prince charming will pay big money to the girl’s family. They have a big wedding and everybody lives happily ever after. The couple have kids and the cycle continues.

That’s the mindset mentality. Now imagine if that girl, instead of marrying her third-cousin (inbreeding to keep all the family fortunes within the family), she instead wants to go to New York, get her degree in fashion design, earn sponsors for her clothing line and she met a real charming (non-related) gentleman who, might not be so rich, but he loves her and supports business venture.

She’s going to be living far away. She’s working. She’s going to marry a white man.

Yup, 3 strikes, she’s out. Papa, get the gun.

Here’s a contradiction. Majority of the reported honour killings cases are highlighted in those close-knit communities that are outside the native country. An Indian community in Canada had an unsolved murder case that had all ties to honour killings. Several Middle-Eastern communities in Britain had unsolved cases of rebellious girls gone missing or got murdered.

An odd contradiction indeed. One would think that more honour crimes should have been highlighted in the native country itself, being with the most number of ‘honourable’ families.

Here’s what I think. There are honour crimes in those native countries.

It’s hidden.

Here’s an example of the government quietly supports honour killings. In Jordan, if a woman tries to go to the police force for protection from her family against possible honour killing, she herself would be put to jail under ‘improper conduct’ since she approached the police force without a male relation (who wants to kill her). She’ll serve a prison sentence of humiliation and when that time is up - lo behold - her family will be notified her detention and she'll be returned to them.

So they can kill her.

Another reason why honour killings are so rampant in overseas communities is because of isolation and close-minded factions.

Asian countries, for a great deal of the last 2 centuries, had been invaded by all the major first-world nations. America, French, British, Dutch, etc had entered Asian countries under a dirty flag of goodwill before they took all our resources. And the people.

This history is still fresh in the minds of the elders in these close-knit honourable communities. It was the first-generation who had to wade through Western prejudices to carve a good-sized self-sufficient group for they-who-got-dumped-as-factory-workers-in-foreign-soil.

To quote Asians are for Asians, the elders remained a tight clique. They also remained as close-minded and harbour their own prejudices. Second-generation and third generation have absorbed these prejudices since infancy. Any new-fangled nonsense invented by their old slave-masters should never be accepted by their pure kin.

That’s how they build their so-called honour; by being ignorant of the changing times, ignorant of the more open-minded new generation.

Likewise, some maybe are abandoning old traditions. Some maybe got fed-up of the obligations and high expectations. Most wanted to express new ideas, their own ideas, and their own legacy in the world that has nothing to do with association of high-born or chaste-blood.

In my heart, nothing can justify honour killings.

Honour killings, death caused by family members, strike a deep cord in me. It’s really stupid, showing the stupidity, the backwardness and the freaking brutality that these families can impose on their own members, using fear to brainwash the true value of what honour is.

My thoughts on this won’t be the end though, because there are more to crimes of honour than brutality towards freedom of individual mind. True family honour comes in support. Love. Integrity. Open-mindedness. And above all, the right for sharing lives, not controlling lives.

BabyNabil's Day Out at Ikano Mall

Most people would be sleeping in on a holiday’s Tuesday as I should have been but I was really looking forward to get this piece of Flash programming DIY book from Popular bookstore in Ikano Power Centre. Ayah declared he was free for the hours after helping Genius take care of his apartment rental so we made plans for an excursion.

Then enter MySis and the homicidal two-year-old, BabyNabil.

Don’t get me wrong. I love my one and only nephew and I think he’s smart enough to know of my evil plans to turn into the embarrassing ‘Auntie Liza’ with him in front of his friends when he turns 16 years old.

Both mother and son loved any and all shopping mall trips, one of the few things MySis and me have in common. So what the heck, let’s bring a five-person joy ride to Ikano. Gives us reason to park in the family parking space too.

Early morning we took our breakfast at the local mamak restaurant.


Ayah forgot to bring his reading glasses. Again.

At breakfast, everybody ordered... almost the same thing; roti kosong, roti telur, roti canai and roti pisang. We didn’t plan on going to any fancy breakfast area in case BabyNabil might order everything on the menu. Restaurants need to feed other customers too, you know.

We then went home to get ready a few pertinent things, such as breakfast take-away for Mak (roti sardin, of course), collecting discount cards and BabyNabil needs his bath.

“Nabil, mandi ye?” (Nabil go take a bath, yes?)
“Tak nak.” (Don’t want.)

My nephew is pretty smart and very vocal. We taught him young to communicate verbally. His pronunciations are bad but he can speak full sentences for as long as 7 words, though you got to listen carefully. He can’t pronounce his own name properly (he calls himself, ‘Ami’).

“Mandi-lah! Nak keluar nanti.” (Go take a bath. We want to go out soon).
“No mandi.” (No bath.)
“Kenapa?” (Why.)
“Tak nak mandi.” (Don’t want bath.)
“Okay, then tak boleh pergi Ikano.” (Alright, then you won’t go to Ikano.)
“Auntie, Ami nak pegi, nak pegi!” (Auntie, Nabil wants to go!)
“Okay, mandi dulu.” (Okay, but bath first).

Silence.

“Tak nak mandi.” (Don’t want bath.)
“Tak nak mandi? Duduk rumah aje. Auntie, PakSu, Atuk dan Mama keluar pergi Ikano” (No bath? Sit at home. Auntie, PakSu, Atuk and Mama will go to Ikano).
“Nak pegi! Nak pegi!” (Iwant to go! I want to go!)
“Kena mandi dulu!” (Bath first!)
“Ami tak nak mandi!” (Nabil don’t want bath!)
“Okay, tinggal rumah, aje.” (Okay, just sit at home.)
“Nak pegi, nak peeeeeeeeeeeegggieeeeee!!”

Stalemate. Thank goodness he’s never got the knack for throwing tantrums. Yet. He doesn’t kick on the floor and scream and shout uselessly but he’s incredibly vocal and specific on what he wants. But he knows with an aunt and a mother against him, he’ll be overruled.

So what did the kid does? Negotiate.

“Okay, tapi Ami mandi babel-babel.” (Okay, but Nabil want a bubble bath.)

Damn pampered brat. He hates showers but likes to play with the shampoo bottle. Even I don’t get a bubble bath. In the end, we threaten to let the big cat have shower with him before he finally conceded.

We didn’t bring a stroller as he’s too big for it now. But enjoys getting carried around. In fact he insists. Even before we left the car park, he insists on being carried. We tried to get him to walk on his own chubby legs but he just lies down on the floor - on the road! - on his back until somebody picks him up.

Heh. Being 2 years old and under 3 feet tall gives him right to make a fool of his folks.

Since MySis is too pregnant to carry BabyNabil, Ayah-the-Atuk is mindful of his arthritis and PakSu-Genius is carrying... baby utility stuff (diaper bag, milk bottle, etc), it looks like I’ll have to be the pack-mule.


Up and down the escalators.


Took a scenic route through the Pet Store. This isn’t a mouse display case, by the way. This was a lizard display case. The mouse, still alive, was probably its lunch. Wherever the lizard was.

All in all, we had fun. BabyNabil had 4 pairs of eyes looking out for him as he ran all over the place like a rat on steroids (3 pairs, when I excused buying textbooks in Popular Book Store and again when we pass by the Bread Story bakery). At the Pet Store, he barks at cats, meows at the mice and bangs bird cages.

There was a large grey parrot which fascinated BabyNabil, mainly because the large parrot wasn’t in a cage. The bird then flapped its wings vigorously and BabyNabil got so scared, he ran straight for his Mama.

Typical.

Not to self; get BabyNabil to go for One Utama’s Exotic Animals Exhibition soon. He’ll be firm friends with the monkeys.


Mm-mmm, I can never resist chocolate. Neither does BabyNabil, which I had to eat it behind his back or else he’ll grab hold of it.



Had lunch at Ikea Restaurant. We always choose the big sofa seats at the entrance of the restaurant because the tables were low enough for BabyNabil.


Going home! You can see that he’s getting damned sleepy.