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Tuesday, February 12, 2008

The Single Girl and Her Valentine’s Day

Thanks to Kav and SewJin, their views on love and Valentine’s Day had infected me with the oozy wussy day-dreams of What-I’ll-Do-On-Valentine’s-Day-If-I-Had-A-Man.

I thought I had outgrew all this V-Day stuff since I supplied myself with romantic fiction as a boyfriend substitute but I guess sometimes, one does wonders how does the real thing thinks about February 14.

Bah, humbug.

St Valentine never said that his b-day was a celebration of nyah-nyah-you’re-all-alone. There’s a great virtue in being still single and you don’t have to look hard to find it.

So you’re single and at home. All your girlfriends are out with their guys and your guyfriends are out with their girls and don’t even think about calling on your overly-concerned-too-inquisitive-but-well-meaning family.

To the Mall!

Aha! What better way to forget you’re all alone than to interact with strangers. Get your butt off that chair and take some fresh air... in a shopping area! Take out a little bit of cash with your and take a hike down your favourite departmental stores.

While other couples are busy doing their hair, checking their wardrobe and having trouble reserving a place in their overly-priced Valentine’s dinner, just strut along clothing boutiques and maybe try out the latest fashion design.

You don’t have to wait for anyone and there’s no one around you to be shocked about your eating habits when you devoured that double cheeseburger and large soda. Yup, to the Mall on Valentine’s for your ‘Me-Time’.

Cook Something Special.

Remember when all your mom, aunties, cousins and distant relation by 3rd degrees kept taking you on the “Why are you still single?” inquisition. Well, as much as you want to forget those painful hours, they do have something of a point. As a girl’s role in a married life is to cook and clean, maybe it’s a good time to brush up your cooking skills.

Only this time, you cook what YOU want to eat! Eyeing that chocolate cheese cake? Hm-mmm, how about some chicken steak with honey-lemon sauce? Better yet, take some mince meat and some taco spice seasoning, some burger buns and build a mound of Sloppy Joes! Yum!

Take the Day Off.

Of course, after that hard day’s play of window shopping and new food skills, you do need to relax. Remember, while other girls are screaming into that dress two sizes too small, you’ve just have a nice long bath, wearing your baggy pants and sipping hot Milo drink.

Oh what’s a home girl to do? Make a playlist of soothing songs, snuggle in the couch with a tub of ice-cream and pour into that romance book you’ve always wanted to read (I plan to be immersed in a Julie Garwood). Turn off your phone and lock your door. This is your quiet afternoon and to hell with anybody stopping you.

Be a Fairy Godmother!

Of course, there are some of us who cannot help but be really, REALLY conscious about Valentine’s Day. Well, if you don’t have a date for the evening doesn’t mean the rest of your girlfriends should suffer a night they might want to forget.

Make this night as special for them as you have imagined yours would be. Help them in their small dress, check their hair, make sure their plan of romance is secured (“Should I hold his hand? Should I leave the bouquet of roses in the car while we have dinner?”).

And always remember the emergency Bad-Date cell-phone call. Plan together on making a phone call in the middle of that dinner. If she’s having a bad time, it’s the emergency to I-sorry-but-I-have-to-go action plan and rescue her from the restaurant. If she’s having a great time, you’ll be the very first person to know about it (ooo, start to gossip chain!)

Blog Your Ideal Boyfriend.

Of course, you can’t say that your lack of a better half is the fault of the opposite gender. Just as some folks have a Things-To-Do-Before-I-Die list, make up a Perfect-Guy-For-Me list. Most ladies couldn’t secure a man because they wavered in their decision. Afterall, unlike securing a job, securing a partner takes more consideration (and mostly likely, he’s as undecided as you are).

So make a list and be affirm on who your man should have. Good health. Taller than me. Strong familial bonds. Taller than me. Have religious faith. Taller than me. Secured occupation. Taller than me. Loves kids. And taller than me so I may have a pair of shoulders I can lean back against.

Well, can’t say Valentine isn’t a fun and special day for the single girl. There are many way a sister can celebrate love itself and be thankful that she doesn’t have to put up with the wrong sort of guy.

Me? What am I doing on Valentine’s Day? Well, actually, I have a date with 2 guys on February 14, both at the same time. Yeah, a Java programming course. There’s the lecturer and bus full of 20+ people too. It might even take a whole day.

Well, at least I’ve got 2 guys to get busy with.

Maybe a Flashlight to Get to My Car?

: Hey looky! It’s us again.
: Yeah. Looks like one of us is really trying not to do her homework.
: One of us? Don’t you mean both of us? It takes two to make a whole Quickening.
: You’re the Baddie. This excuse for a blog entry instead of the Java assignment is all your fault.
: Oh sure, blame it on my horns. As if your Brainy wings are pure white.
: Much as I like to banter with myself, I have something that’s been bothering me in my mind since last Thursday.
: Ooo, you scared of the dark, Pretty-Wings?
: It’s more likely to say that I’m scared of what crawls in the dark.
: Aren’t you a little old for-
: Not monsters. I mean snatch-thieves, kidnappers and midnight lepak-ing boys.
: Oooh, that kind of menace.
: Yeah. Just because I’m paranoid doesn’t mean a gang of 3 guys isn’t hiding in a dark car in the alley between shoplots.
: And we - I - park really far from my car. This is the risk I face with for trying to save parking money.

From school to my car, my usual route.

: Saaay, this thing wasn’t an inspiration from SewJin’s blog is it?
: No, my stick figure is prettier than his.
: Agreed.
: On most days at school, I’m not worried since I walk during the day.
: But on Thursday s, class ends at 9pm.
: Late night. Dark.
: Yeah. Too bad I can only go home with one of me.
: My biggest fear would be route B. to C. since it’s so dark and a lot of folks park cars on both sides of the one-way street.
: Funny, I thought I’ll be more afraid of route C. to D.; crossing the street.
: Yeah, but since it’s at dark night, there’s hardly any cars on the street.
: More space for snatch-thieves on motorbikes to hit-and-run.
: Okay, now you’re scaring me worse.
: Sorry.
: So... what’s an alternative route back to the parked car?

Alternative route No. 1

: How bout this one? There are security guards along the school blocks.
: Maybe.
: Why does my bad self sound so uncertain?
: It’s route C. to D.; us British-infected cars drive on the left side with steering wheel on the right.
: Oooh, okay. You’re scared that somebody might catch you by surprise from behind.
: TV ads did say walk facing the traffic.
: So we’ll walk on the other side of the big road then.
: Next to the ‘Big Construction Site’? There are big trucks parked there at night. Anything can hide in between them moving cement mixers.
: Pessimist.
: I’m cautious. No amount of pepper spray can help you if the dark-stalkers take you by surprise first.
: Let’s try another route then.

Alternative route No. 2

: Aaah, I can see much potential problems.
: Whaddya mean? This is a great alternative route. Point B. to C. is always busy and full of people. There’s no way criminals can strike here.
: It’s not the criminals hiding I’m worried about.
: Then what the heck-
: It’s me.
: You?
: Me.
: Me?
: No, I mean me.
: Who me? Or you?
: ME!!
: Oh, meeeeee...
: Will you stop that?!
: You know, intrapersonal communication with myself is so much fun.
: You enjoy amusing yourself. You’re weird. You’re weird freaking towards Tanjung Rambutan.
: Yay, the crazy hospital. No, seriously, why don’t you like Alternative route No. 2?
: The problem is that I like it too much.
: *blinks*
: Temptation flares between route B. to C. KFC, Giant shopping, Ayamas, King Story bakery.
: Oh my gosh.
: And the piece-de-resistance, that restaurant mamak next to Kelana Furniture Mall.
: Your tandoori chicken addiction.
: I can smell it by just thinking about it! Aaaarrrggghhh!!
: Eeep! The diet! Remember the diet! Let’s think of another way, say...

: No way!
: *sigh* What now?
: The road has hardly any streetlights, much less working streetlights. Lots of dark cars park there.
: Gotcha, let’s try again.

: That’s even worse.
: How-?
: It’s as bad at the one before but the alley has a direct road straight to the LDP. Anything can hide in that road, grab me and be gone in 60 seconds flat.
: Okay, this isn’t helping at all.
: You must think of all the safety planning and precaution!
: Oh great. Now I’m mad at me.
: Well, you started it.
: How bout I just fly to my car? Look I got my wings already.
: You’re being weird again.
: I’m the weirdo with wings. I’ll split myself and leave you behind since you’re such a big help.
: Oooi! Don’t you dare!
: Bye-bye Baddie. Pretty-Wings can’t stop to walk alone on Thursday nights!

Alternative route No. 3

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